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Have 1 or 2 other folks look at it aswell.

Because doesn't join the ideas of the sentence together right and, being an result, the reader will not understand what the author would like to say. Both sentences indicate that these troubles will carry on later on. You need to utilize the transitional or connective phrases within your endeavor 2 as it really is mentioned on the list of vital components to reach a better score in academic IELTS writing 2. The composition is commonly a discourse of the theme of common interest. The topic does not need to maintain the very first word, but it must be made clear somewhere within the introduction. I individually such as the view in the beginning of the article. You constantly have to have a thesis.